Family Values
The family is a very important institution in China. It is the cornerstone on which the nation is built. The saying, "Have family, have country, have I." is central to the Chinese identity. Good old Confucius, in his teachings, outlined the blueprints which still permeate the running of a modern Chinese family.
The concept of filial piety is blooded in every Chinese as soon as they reach the age of reason. It's simple. The father is the "emperor" of the family. All major decisions in the family are made by him. He is the provider. The mother is the "empress". Since the father has to be away most of the time, she is the one who actually executes the daily functions of the family. The early education and shaping of the children's character are basic responsibilities of the mother.
Children are treated as treasure in the family. When they are young, the parents take care of them so that when the parents are old, they will return the goodwill.
In the West, the family setup is a little different. The father is rarely the "emperor". Family governance is more democratic where the mother has as much influence as the father in major decision making. Children are raised to be independent. Being strongly independent in China is very uncommon, and many people will be flabbergasted if you are traveling alone, as many Chinese are conditioned to be reliant on other people, and always travel with friends and family or in large groups.
Better social security packages available for the elderly in the West reduce the burden of support on the children. In China, such support is unavailable. Thus, the duty of caring for the elderly falls squarely on the children.
For the past 20 years, China has been enjoying tremendous economical growth. The mushrooming of factories across the country has presented many opportunities for people in rural areas to get jobs. Now, it is normal for children to leave the family to seek greener pastures elsewhere. Depending on the location of their vocation, the children may be relocated thousands of miles away from their homes. This migratory employment phenomenon has placed a bane on traditional family unity.
In small towns and villages, most of the young people are away. If the younger people have children, they are placed under the care of the grandparents in the family homes where the standards of living are lower. The economic growth has swept China in new winds of revolution. Modern Chinese women have caught on and they make up a good proportion of the labor force. Now, they are also providers of the family. So, often the traditional role of the mother is parlayed to the grandmother.
While they are away, the children seldom call home as long distance phone calls are luxuries of sorts. Neither do they write warm bright letters home as most of their parents are hard of reading. They go through long periods of silence. The only sign that indicate the children are alive and doing well is the monthly increase in the bank account balance.
However, absence makes the family grow stronger. Despite the separation and the silence, cometh the New Year holidays, cometh the Labor Day holidays, the mighty legions of migratory workers across the vast face of China pack the trains and the highways to journey home. There is only one thing in their minds and hearts: Family. As they sit down with their parents and their children whom they have not seen for a long time, all the months of separation evaporate as they eat and talk as if they had never been apart.
In Chinese, family is jia. Jia is translated as home. When the Chinese talks about family, they are referring to a warm abode. It is their roots. It is their home. The concept of a home-town is also very strong—no matter where a Chinese person ends up, their true home is always where they were born, and until recently the vast majority of people would never move from their original home.